Deerhunter's Microcastle Review (as seen in Outback Steakhouse's Quarterly Magazine)

So a couple months ago, a friend of a friend set me up with my first big break: reviewing an album of my choice for Outback Steakhouse's quarterly magazine. It was a really amazing opportunity, and I am glad to say that here is the fruit of that opportunity:

My roommate sent me a link to Deerhunter's new album a while ago, and I've been loving it ever since. It's easily going to be one of my favorite albums of the year. It is simply amazing.

In order to explain my feelings for Microcastle, I am going to give a track by track analysis of what makes each song so good, in an easy to understand manner.

"Intro"
The opening track to Microcastle is reminiscent of walking into an Outback Steakhouse. Much as the scents of other customers food establishes the meal about to ensue, "Intro" is filled with sounds that will be explored later in the album. And just like walking into the Outback Steakhouse, you can't exactly pinpoint why, but you just know you are getting into something incredible.

"Agoraphobia"
The second track is the Bloomin Onion of the album. You have finally sat down, your waiter has arrived with a smile on her face, and BAM! sweet, sweet succulence is shoved down your throat. You almost can't believe how beautiful things have gotten in such a short span of time. It ends, and you actually think you might cry; not now maybe, but you know in your heart that someday, someplace, it will happen, and it will surprise no one.


"Never Stops"
If "Agoraphobia" is the Bloomin' Onion, "Never Stops" is the Outback Steakhouse's Pink Lemonade-unbelievably juicy, quench thirsting and refreshing. You don't think so much beauty could come to you so quickly. It suddenly becomes clear that this is a place you will want to be coming back to.

"Little Kids"
The fourth track, much like the Tassie's Buffalo Wings, is purely delicious, though a little spicy for some.

"Microcastle"
The beginning of "Microcastle" is a little slow and boring. It brings to mind the time spent waiting for a Top Shelf Patron Margarita. But once the drums kick in, the song becomes the musical equivalent to a Top Shelf Patron Margarita: thrilling, pounding, and uplifting.

"Calvary Scars"/"Green Jacket"/"Activa"
The three songs that follow "Microcastle" evoke the same feelings felt at the beginning of that song. Only instead of waiting for a Top Shelf Patron Margarita, these three songs are reminiscent of waiting for one of the Outback Steakhouses entrees. Boredom settles in.

"Nothing Ever Happened"
From the depths of boredom comes this savory track. Full of life and capable of inflicting sensory overload, no piece of music in recent memory has come this close to replicating the experience of indulging in a Chargrilled Ribeye.

"Saved By Old Times"
It only takes five words to aptly describe "Saved By Old Times": Outback Steakhouse's Key Lime Pie.

"Twilight at Carbon Lake"
The final song on Microcastle bears a strong resemblance, in both tone and ambiance, to standing in the parking lot of the Outback Steakhouse. Within seconds, the memories of the night come pouring back. The pure magic of the night becomes palatable. All the little portions-the bloomin onion, the ribeye-wander through your memory, until the only logical conclusion is tears.