Prince is going to fuck a rock.
Finally, after years of planning, wishing, hoping and praying, Prince's desire to fuck a rock will come true this Saturday.
Prince stated, in a small press conference held last week at Paisley Park, that the idea to fuck a ruck came to him in a dream in 1984, while filming a scene that was ultimately cut from the final cut of Purple Rain. "We were filming this love scene under a water fallwith Apollonia, but I couldn't take my eyes off these rocks", Prince disclosed.
Following the release of Purple Rain, Prince met with many top Geologists to discuss the legistics of Prince-on-rock action. "The hardest part was figuring out which rocks would be best to fuck, and which would just be painful", Geologist Randy Meyers says. "We knew Sedimentary rocks would be too jagged. We knew that igneous rocks would be perfect, but were afraid they'd be too young."
Prince insisted that the rock be of age, possibly in response to a previous incident involving an underaged tree. "Literally, this project was two years searching for the perfect rock and 16 waiting for it to turn 18."
The 18 year in the making sex session will finally become a reality this Saturday at Madison Square Garden. Tickets are 60 dollars in advance, and 70 dollars day of. For those unable to attend, Prince's press secretary recently confirmed rumors the event would make its way to DVD. "Though it's not 100% official, I can very confidently say this will definately be available to the public shortly."
Prince has not stated if he plans to marry the rock, or even take it out on a second date. "It all depends" Prince says. "I don't want to rush into a relationship, but I mean if love is in the air...I guess I have to breathe it in."
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